I Think I'm Gonna Love The New Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

As I’m sure you are well aware, there is a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie on its way and, to be fair, we haven’t been all that welcoming to it. In general the internet has beat this film to within an inch of its life, and that was before it even had a trailer. Then when we got the first dark and brooding trailer our hopes fell even further and we set the poor bastard alight. But with a rash of rather good looking TV Spots, maybe, just maybe we are a little bit wrong and maybe we might just enjoy this film.

The warning bells for this film went off rather early and, sure, we can all see why. I mean, Mr. Michael Bay‘s name was attached, which of course brings with it a huge amount of doubt. But let’s not forget that the man’s latest monstrosity is looking to be the highest grossing movie of the year so you can understand the trust Big Hollywood has in him. To be fair he wasn’t directing because this film would be in the hands of South African local Jonathan Liebesman. Okay he isn’t the best. I mean, he does mostly horrors and his other two big blockbuster outings were the resoundingly poor Wrath of The Titans and of course Battle LA. If I’m honest, I rather enjoyed that last one. It was a sit-back-and-veg kind of movie. But people are understandably a little bit shaken with the decisions being made about this new Turtles movie. Let’s not even get started on all the leaked script space alien nonsense and such, because since then those details have proven to be fake. But yes, after all the initial announcements it kinda seemed like people were just plain out to get this movie.

So why all this hate? Probably due to the fact that people have a lot of investment in the Turtles. Hell, we all grew up with them. Even now kids are growing up with them on Nickelodeon‘s latest take on the franchise, which is brilliant. There have been so many takes on the iconic characters, who have become so entrenched in our lives for 30 years – that’s right, 30 fucken years. We all have an idea of who and what The Green Machine is. But do we really?

Cos on my count, in the last 30 years there have been four to six different comic runs, from the original 80s black & white series to IDW’s current comics. There have been four different TV series; the original from the late 80s, the live action one from the mid-90s, the animated series from the 2000s, and now Nickelodeon’s current CG series. And wait, there have been four other movies before this one. If you break it down, there have been a lot of different takes on the four brothers, and I”m sure we have all liked one or another. Maybe like me, you like all of them. Because the Turtles can be light and playful or dark and intense.

Sure, the Turtles look really weird in the new movie, but I’m pretty sure 28-year-old Jordan would have thought that the 90s movies costumes look stupid too. Guys in rubber suits hey? And if we look at the designs they are really different and interesting, also all based around each character’s personality and traits. Raph stands out to me the most as someone who would likely be obsessed with MMA and so he’s dressing like it. But that’s the thing isn’t it? We don’t love the Turtles because of their look. We have had tons of cool looking characters who we hate - here’s looking at you, Transformers.

We love the Turtles because of their personalities and the way they all work together and clash because of those very same personalities. And the latest batch of TV spots have made me do a full 180 on my hate. Why? Because look, Liebesman got their personalities in there, dammit. There is a scene where the Turtles literally do a beat box with their weapons… Sold!

Maybe little 5-year-old Jordan has been awoken again. Maybe I’m just looking for a serious laugh, but here was what was missing from the first trailers; the playfulness and the brothers interacting. We don’t need some mysterious trailer not showing us the Turtles. We have known them for 30 years. What we needed is the fun, the action, the crazy visual effects and maybe just maybe the marketing department realized that. After these little glimmers of hope I’m going to watch this movie and I think I’m going to enjoy it. Just not the Skrillex. Fuck you, Skrillex. Wanna see what I’m blah blah blahing about? Well just watch the TV spots below.